Greetings People,
I believe many of us are in a profession where we are expected to help people whether we are physically and mentally well or not. Definitely we are paid for it but we know we have gone extra miles to help some people in need even when no one has rewarded you. Sometimes you have to force yourself to do it, because you must be hurt or wounded yourself but people require you. In the helping profession such as therapist, doctors, teachers, customer advisers, social workers, police officers and our soldiers; we chose to do it. We just don’t exclusively do it in our jobs but as husband, wife, daughters, sons, mother, father, brother and in every relationship we look out for others even when we are hurt. We chose to stay by the side of the people who are suffering because we want to help but we know when we go back home, we have the same pain and problems which we can’t handle by ourselves. We are not just mere healers but ‘wounded healers’.
As we are going to welcome our summers, hitting the beach, gulping waters and find solace in air conditioners; I also want you to welcome the season of Easter where we rejoice in the Lord and share his suffering in his sacrifices. The sacrifice made solely to suffer for us and for our sins. Suffering isn’t a pretty word for most of us and we want to believe in a God who can provide our needs when asked. But we do need to understand that before Grace comes suffering. The suffering I mean is the process or journey of attaining the Grace. One of the pastor at our workplace delivered a message on ‘Wounded Healers’. I would say that is something as people we need to understand to be able bring a difference in other’s life.
Wounded Healer or also can be called as a healer who is imperfect and hurt himself. The perception of healer in our minds is someone who has attained self-actualisation, seen life and is free from adversities. But a definition of healer is quiet opposite. Jesus was considered a healer if we look at the new testament, he goes around healing the sick and performing miracles. But little do we reflect on the life of Jesus as a healer, he was hurt, rejected, poor and even crucified where he struggled to bring his own people to salvation. But he healed. He chose to heal when he himself had been broken. He broke himself to give life to us. He healed us and redeemed us. What do we understand from the life of Jesus?
My journey as a therapist was more by chance and some by choice. But I always identified with the pain of a sufferer who was sad, depressed and in agony. More so because I had been the same person, it became easier to identify and empathise. But as a healer, I understand my problems is an experience to understand human emotions but never a framework. The framework is different yet the pain is pain. Most people asked me, I might not be able to be healer as a therapist because they saw me as wounded fragile person. But its always the weak who can endure the pain well due to the exposure and the emotional resilience we develop with response to a problem. Definitely, healing doesn’t come easy due to a experience but the choice of work they are willing to put to help the individuals. The effort that counts and the willingness to be open towards refining one’s flaws as you grow as a person and as a therapist.
Healing is for everyone despite of our backgrounds, we understand most of us are wounded either by events or by people. We also understand that there is no such ultimate healer who exist is not wounded by events or people. What makes a wounded healer a better healer? He/She knows the pain, the pain of people who he/she sees day in and day out. Wounded healer can identify with the pain and suffering and navigate the people out of the pain or atleast share part of the pain. Yet, the beauty of healing comes from love which has the power to heal itself.
In the study of neurobiology of stress, one of the hormones which is vital in reversing damage from stress and moderate the stress reaction is oxytocin. Oxytocin is also called as ‘love hormone’ or ‘cuddle chemical’ which is released when there is an emotional bond between people. This is usually released when we help people, when we share love and when we show concern for others. A hormone which can help you live longer too. This was a study conducted by Kubzansky et.al., 2012 where they were able to show that people who had been exposed to increased stress and later started helping people lived longer compared to the controls.
Healing is holistic coming from love, empathy, peace, health and overall well-being provided for both the healer and the individual. When we wake up in the morning with our own problems weighing us down, imagine being a light for someone else who can be at peace because of you. That goodness will radiate lives and your life. So, reflect on your self as a person and as a healer whether you have changed since you were chosen to heal and help people. One of the proudest designation one can hold is, ‘I am a wounded healer’.
Spread Love
Wow